*This poem contains swear words*

Re-vision

I stumbled my way into STEPPS
Apprehensive of what I’d find
20 weeks said to be ‘intense’
Was I out of my bloody mind!
But lost, I found I needed direction
I finally had to succumb….
Maybe with some light from the intervention
I could be more than I’d become. 
It’s not easy, frequently causing pain,
Coming to terms with myself….
I almost gave up / gave in again
Leaving my future marooned on the shelf.
So I’m opening my ‘boxes’ buried to deep
Re-viewing what that s*** was about,
‘Challenging’, ‘filtering’. Choosing what to keep,
and kicking the rest of the rubbish right out!
The pain remains distanced, with the occasional nod….
I know, I no longer want to be that ‘bod’.
I’m not saying that this is the answer
It’s just my personal view….
But so far I feel more solid, more in touch,
More aware of what or not to do.
We’re all different, but all the same….
There’s no common answer or cure.
Learning the method, the savvy, shedding the blame,
Helps me understand…me…others….more.

by Gerri